Sunday Stories: Welcoming Change with Grace
A message from a childhood friend popped up during my periodic Facebook Messenger check-ins. Another indication that we are all energetically connected. I'd read a message shortly after it was sent, about a week or so. My notifications are strictly for family and close friends on the opposite side of the world; otherwise, I'll respond to a message when I see it, whenever that may be.
"I'm pregnant!" she wrote.
We've been friends since kindergarten. She lives in Dubai now. We'd send our annual birthday greetings and chat online now and then. Our friend group has disbanded, at least geographically — one is in London, another is in New Zealand, some are in the Philippines, and I am in Los Angeles.
I take pride in having high-quality, lifelong friendships. I'm convinced it's one of my gifts. I'd been a Maid of Honor twice, a bridesmaid a handful of times, and have lost count of how many times I've been a Godmother. My brother is a decade older, and my family lives oceans away, so my friends have become family. I have a group chat with my high school friends, and it's always wonderful to hear from them. I met my inner circle in LA at 21, except for my best friend; we met in high school.
Now I know there are friends, and there are people you know. There are best friends; then there is your BFF. And sometimes friends will turn into best friends and vice versa in different stages of the journey. That is the beauty of life and friendship — it is ever-changing. It is up to you to maximize the experience as it is happening. I used to say I was not interested in making new friends. I felt, and still do to a great extent, that I've met my forever friends. I cherish and keep them in my heart, but to be closed off to new friendships would be a disservice.
My friendships have evolved. One has dissolved, while another has transformed into a purposeful friend. A very close friend is coming into her own. Each of them has brought immense joy, and I've learned to honor where my relationships stand. People move in different spaces and paces. It's vital to recognize when something must end and just as important to give others breathing room. In my pursuit of success, I feared our lives would be so different that we'd lose that connection. I don't anymore. Change is inevitable and part of the process. You've got to make room for the new. Hold on to people who fill up your cup and love them deeply while staying open to the possibility of it all.